November 2010
Thirty Days
So I’ve totally put off Day 30 on my Thirty Day writing. I just haven’t really had a good last moment to fill it with. So I haven’t done it.
A million moments have surely passed me by, but I’m not sure which to write about. When I figure it out, or when one of the million moments to come seems like something good to write about know I will post it. But until then, I wait...
So, it’s officially the beginning hours of Friday, the 26th of November 2010. I have not applied to one college. Not one. I think I may apply to a total of four. All three in state and one out of state, just so I can see if I could make it somewhere else. Not so much that I, or well, my parents, could afford to make it somewhere else, I just want to see. I know I can get in to all in state...
Must. Survive. Until. Winter. Break….
My mom and I went to lunch. I thought I saw him. I froze on our way inside. Freezing, my face falling, as I murmured “On no….” I stood there, absolutely still. I dreaded moving. I wasn’t sure how to turn and hit the door. How to explain. And then I realized it wasn’t who I thought it was. And I inhaled again. I think my heart even started again. By the time we got to...
Cool; Gwen Stefani →
“Memories seem like so long ago, time always kills the pain. Remember Harbor Boulevard, the dreaming days where the mess was made. Look how all the kids have grown, we have changed but we’re still the same. After all that we’ve been through, I know we’re cool. And I’ll be happy for you, if you can be happy for me. Circles and triangles, and now we’re hanging out...
“There are rules, there are guidelines, and then there are ways to make things...”
– Erin Hooper
I’ve officially locked the text in my inbox that say “I’m always thinking of you”. It is the third message locked from the contact in my inbox. It was a drunk text, but there’s that saying: A drunk mind speaks sober thoughts.
In a sense, I believe it. In another, I know better.
“The past is far too big for it to remain forever locked there; it sometimes...”
– Constance Thaete.
No one tells you...
the important things. Or the useful things. And I’ve known for awhile now, that in reality, no one can do you justice. Infact, the only person who can do you justice, is you.
With that said:
I, of all people, should know that the past is far to big to stay locked there, without ever once finding it’s way into the present.
What hurts more is feeling like I can’t trust one of...
This has nothing to do with normal posts. It’s just something I’m writing here because I am concerned. I am concerned for my face. I started breaking out more and more. Starting last spring, when I would get occational breakouts along the bottom half of my face. By September, a month after my 18th birthday, I feel like it started getting worse. I wsahed my face daily, exfoliating. My...
Day Twenty Nine
First, I’ve been avoiding doing these last two, because I’m not sure what to say exactly. But I’m so close to finishing, I can’t just throw it aside.
Day 29 – Your aspirations
Alright so, I looked up aspirations, just to make sure I was clear on what it is:
Aspirations - n - A hope or ambition of achieving something; the object of such an ambition; a goal.
So I...
Day Twenty Eight
Day 28 – Something that you miss
I’m attaching this to Day 27; all the places attached are all places I miss.
Day Twenty Six
Day 26 – Your fears
So I think my biggest actual fears are sharks and the dentist.
But in life, I think I fear not going anywhere, not doing what I want to do. But who doesn’t fear that?
Day Twenty Five
Day 25 – A first
This is another difficult one. I don’t know if I’ve has nay really memorable firsts. First kiss? Covered that. First boyfriend? I have a hard time figuring out who the first one really was; which ones count and which don’t. Maybe I’m thinking too intimate?
My first concert wasn’t really memorable….
I wish I had a tattoo or some cool...
Day Twenty Four
Day 24 – Something that makes you cry
I think I generally cry when frustrated or scared.
So math has a habit or making me cry. Because I get frustrated with math fast. Really fast.
When I’m scared, it depends. A lot has been going on, and I haven’t cried, but I think I’ve wanted to. Things could be worse, but that doesn’t stop from what is happening any less scary....
“You have to know the past to understand the present.”
– Carl Sagar.
Day Twenty Three
Dat 23 - Things that make you feel better
I think music automatically makes me feel better. Whether it actually puts me in a better mood or just allows me to relate to something, it simply makes me better.
Tonight I realized something that makes me feel better is dancing. Which involves music. But when a catchy song I like comes on, Tonight as we said goodbye to realtives I just couldn’t...
No idea where else to post this. But definately got a cute pair of shoes today. They are tall and glittery. They color is called like smoked rose or something. It’s like a copery gold maybe? But it’s all glitter. So cute and pretty. And they make my legs look long. I think I am going to wear them to the wedding tomorrow. If not the wedding for sure the reception!
Day Twenty Two
Day 22 - Things that make you upset
Hmm. I’m trying to think of things that make me upset. Probably stupid things… Boys. Girls. Stupid people. Sometimes, I just get a mood swing for no apparent reason and become upset.
I suppose though that if my feelings get hurt or I don’t agree with someone I get upset. Ridiculous people who come in to work can make me upset. But I vent...
Day Twenty One
Day 21 – Another moment
Another moment. I’m so unsure of what this moment is supposed to be. Any moment in time? What qualifies as a moment anyway?
I’m trying really hard to think of a good moment. One that is you know, intresting, but not one of those moments that I need to forget about rather than remember.
… Okay, maybe I’ll come back to this. I can’t think...
Day Twenty
Day 20 – This month
It’s the very beginning of November. It’s going to be a crazy week. At least the next two weeks. I have a bunch to get done basically in the next twenty four hours before Friday and before we leave. For school and for the trip. And then on top of that I have work tomorrow night.
Earlier I think I laid out how busy my next week and a half are. I go to California...
Day Nineteen
Day 19 – Something you regret
I used to hear it all the time. To have no regrets because you only live once. Because at some point what you regret was what you wanted. But I’ve always firmly believed in the importance of some kind of regret. Because isn’t it regret that teaches you not only about yourself, but lessons otherwise not possibly learned? I try to learn from everything....
“I try to take one day at a time, but sometimes several days attack me at once.”
– Jennifer Yane.
So, I’m terrible. I have a paper I need to be writing, but I think I’m just going to do what I have as my outline and take that in tomorrow.
I have so much to do, and today I definitely did not accomplish even close to half of what I should have. And then I check my work schedule. And I’m just feeling like… well— Oh, boy.
Tomorrow, Tuesday, is my least busiest day...
Day Eighteen
Day 18 – Your favorite birthday
My favorite birthday. I think my favorite birthday was probably my sweet 16. My sister and I share a birthday, so I was turning 16 and she was turning 18, and my mom threw us a big surprise party. I think toward the very end my sister and I caught on a little bit. Extra beers in the fridge did it for my sister and a spotless downstairs bathroom did it for me. But...
Day Seventeen
Day 17 – Your favorite memory
How am I supposed to pick between them all?
